A Worn-Out Working Mum’s Story

The Struggle of Balancing Work and Motherhood

So many of us are struggling with the demands of motherhood and work, and it can feel like no one truly understands the weight of it all. That’s why I want to share a story from Rosie. Her experience is all too familiar for many of us - dealing with unrealistic expectations, unsupportive work environments, and the exhausting realities of being a working mum. Here’s what she had to say about her journey:

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Rosie’s Story:

"I returned to work last year four months after having my son. I work at a startup in the US on the product team. I was very lucky to get that much time off. When I started, the company offered 14 weeks of maternity leave and I used all my vacation to take the longest amount of time possible. This year (and after three other women in the company also went on maternity leave), the company updated their policy to only give women 6 weeks off. When I was hired, I was actually already one month pregnant, but I didn’t tell them. I was terrified it would impact my chances of getting the job, so I kept it to myself. My first boss, who was based in the UK, was supportive when I told him. I later found out his wife was also expecting, which was comforting, but I had no idea what I was getting into.

I worked for three months before my boss and another manager went on "garden leave." Suddenly, I was the only Product Manager left in the company. I was juggling everything, working with engineering teams in both the US and EU, and managing markets from the US to Australia. It was a lot. But I kept pushing through.

When my first boss left, they reassigned someone from the sales team to be my new boss. He was intense, but surprisingly supportive about my pregnancy. In fact, he promoted me before I started my maternity leave, which was a huge confidence boost, and I got a nice pay bump to help with the incoming costs of a newborn.

But when I came back from maternity leave, everything had changed.

I had been managing the US markets, but when I returned, they reassigned me. The team had reorganized, and I had a new boss. A guy who was hired at the same level as me and should have been my coworker, but he had weaseled his way into a senior role while I was out and was now overseeing my work. He also created a new roadmap for the company, one that was completely different from what I had been promised before I left. I had even kept in touch with my coworkers, joining a call once a week to make sure I was in the loop and the new hires knew who I was. It didn't help.

The project I was supposed to be leading when I returned was pushed off for another year and a half, and surprise, my new boss was now taking over leading it. I was supposed to manage the team, but instead, I was "helping" him with it.

To make matters worse, two of my colleagues were fired. The new hire that was supposed to report to me was left in the lurch, and we were all left to pick up the slack. Meanwhile, the CEO, who seemed to take pleasure in publicly lecturing me, regularly questioned why things were taking longer than expected, even though the issues were entirely out of my control and we were understaffed. There was no support, and the daily pressure was unbearable.

I’ve been job hunting for 15 months now. I’ve had three interviews, but they were all dead ends. It’s a harsh reality when you’re in a job you hate but can't afford to leave. My husband and I both work and we can’t survive on just one income.

And here’s the hardest part: I don’t have family support. I’m one of four siblings, but my parents always visit my brother and sister, who live hours away, but never come to help us. It’s like we’re the black sheep of the family. I don’t have any friends to turn to, mom friends or otherwise, and it’s been incredibly lonely.

Returning to work after becoming a mother is so much harder than I ever thought it would be. We’re not the same person we were before. My son is my world, and I would do anything to spend more time with him, but right now, it’s all about survival.

So, I keep pushing forward, even though it feels like everything’s stacked against me."

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Rosie’s story isn’t just one of struggles at work, it’s a reality that so many of us face. The pressure, the lack of support, and the feeling of being stuck in a job we can’t leave. But it’s also a story of perseverance. It’s a reminder that, no matter how tough things get, we keep going because we have no other choice.

If you would ever like to share your story get in touch with me here. X